David Ebersman, a former executive at biotech firm Genentech, was named Monday as Facebook's chief financial officer. His first assignment will be to determine if Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg has any human qualities and really is over age 14.

David Ebersman has been selected as Facebook's chief financial officer. He will take over the position once he has selected his five favorite bands, movies, beers and baseball teams, answered several dozen quizzes, and proved to superiors that he can adequately defend sleazy dating service ads and pages that take 10 minutes to completely load.